Frenemies & Love

Frenemies & Love
by Arhata

 
October 24, 2016
Heaven one day, hell the next is not worth the joy of paradise unless you have heaven in your heart. Two people with the changing weather persona’s are locked in a psychological gun battle at any time. There is something to be said for ‘what you are, you will attract’. In any case, being well balanced and equipped to handle those who initiate discord is a talent to develop particularly in the world of meeting many co workers, strangers, relatives, fair weather friends, and who knows. Most everyone has within them an enemy to themselves that isn’t far below the surface. Friend and yet an enemy hidden behind the veil of fried is an oxymoron called ‘frenemy’. 

Whether you’re commuting on the subway, standing in line at the grocery store, or sitting in the waiting room of your dentist’s office, chances are you’ll probably find yourself in the company of others who are doing the same. Despite often being surrounded by other people on a daily basis in situations like these, only rarely do we ever strike up conversations with them. Since we consider these people to be strangers, the general norm is to ignore them. But a fascinating study conducted by researchers from the University of Chicago Booth School of Business revealed that interacting with strangers actually makes us happier. And the  ‘stranger’ may well become a best friend who never becomes a ‘float away’ friend as if they are an enemy!
 
Two of the very special people in my life are examples of ‘real’ lover friend vs a fair weather lover frenemy. Both were close, but one had ‘goblins’ called ‘fears, self doubt, perceptionitis, paranoia, rotating self anger, and a hodgepodge of recurring unresolved child issues. A sweetheart when the dancing demons went somewhere else. In her case, her name should have warned me, ‘Jennifer Helen Paradise’! The middle name being the key (‘Hell in’). Her love was here and then not, while mine always loved the Paradise part. 

Years prior to that, I met a stranger on a hot Lexington Ave. subway line at the token booth, then continuing on to Grand Central Station. That stranger became the answer to my quest for the ultimate experience of love, and is the inspiration for my writing theme of ‘love and relationships as a spiritual path’. Mazel tov!

Better a continuing ‘light friend’ than one who becomes someone who leaves you with fond memories but has shut the connection. Everyone has ‘frenemies’. Why be one to yourself, and then pass it on to another. Always having an ‘open door’ of caring will help heal anything in you that creates the ‘frenemy’. As one ‘salty old codger in my Yesss Meditation Center said, ‘’ being a frenemy is just bullshit’’, and he further said, ‘’I don’t make this stuff up’’!

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