January 14, 2016
Should certain people in your life be ‘red flagged’ for ‘danger may unnecessarily have reactions to things you say’, and with no ill intent on your part?
Fear and ignorance hide behind most reactions to stimuli, and that stimuli is often from a false perception of words emanating from someone else. Fear and reactiveness can be instinctual and protective, or practical for survival like the bird that flies off when approached, or the caution we use when crossing the street. The ‘drama’ occurs when someone has acquired the unnecessary habit to react to words that seem to evoke their ego’s negative response called ‘reaction’ or jumping to false conclusions.
It’s even a form of censorship that, unknowingly to the perpetrator, blocks smooth dialog. Sadly, many people who are otherwise fine people, limit quality dialog interaction by eliciting reactions that puts others into a fear of being able to communicate anything. The ‘receiver’ of reactivity, cantankerousness, or just bad temper are often ignited to react where they wouldn’t have otherwise. The easily irritated and snippet, short fused initiator of ‘reactionary drama’ is asleep to their non awareness of the problem they are constantly spreading. They are likely in denial of it, especially if they have a circle of people who ‘tip toe’ around them to avoid confrontation to keep the friendship or avoid confrontation. The friendship becomes based in part on ‘censorship’.
Some places on earth, like some people, you have to go deep to get water, or with people, to go deeper for love to come up. In both cases, it’s always there. The sustenances of life are not always easily or readily available when not in the form of insight, tolerance, trust, patience, etc. When needed, many positive qualities are there be they under the surface, and not easily apparent or easily overlooked. Irritability and prickly behavior needs to be either owned in relation to others all the time, or better yet, downgraded with intention, meditation and more self love in letting go of what causes the irritant.
Anyone at ease, and at ‘one with themselves’ with an open heart will not be a ‘carrier of fractious behavior that puts another on the defensive. Rarely is it an easy task to convey another’s quirks. If you’re the one with the challenging behavior, then you can own that you have it, practice admitting it frequently to others. That is being kind to them, and at the same time deepening your awareness of the problem. Commit to the intent to change the habit. Meditation will help. Life is short, why not give yourself the best you have ‘within’ as well as to others?! Dialog in communication is an art. Be an artist of communication!