February 14, 2013
Alone and lonely at home, or is it really ‘at home’? For most of history’s time, people have lived in families or huddling together in huts, caves, and non amenity makeshift houses. Independence started for the first time along with the sexual revolution, picking up steam in the 1970’s for millions who were more life style adventurous. As the years have passed, many of those ‘live alone and independent types’ continue to do so into the ‘graying generations’. Coupled with millions who just found themselves living alone, over 25% of our population lives alone, and as high as 50% in some cities.
With the opportunity and social acceptedness of being independent, often alone has been bolstered by imagined freedoms that seem to have hidden people’s personal flaws and weaknesses that in the past were just accepted and dealt with. People in the past were often ‘stuck’ with each other, many with not the options of freedom as today. The ability to ‘disconnect’ whether it be divorce or just ‘moving on’ is common. The ‘old commitment’ has often been replaced by mind changing, and imagined ease of ‘starting over’, at least for the younger. Somewhere in all of this, people have found themselves disconnected from the happy coupling that seemed to be encouraged by all forms of media from magazines to movies.
Whether living alone or ‘alone with someone’, millions have locked themselves away from personal growth even though the information means to do so is everywhere. Friendships are ‘fickle’ and more susceptible to corrosion than ever. TV, Internet, and social watching opportunities replace quality personal friendships. Living alone can literally be alone in your abode, or with little communication with another you’re living with. A sense of withdrawal even depression, particularly when living alone as time goes by, tends to create quirky, quirks that make intimate contacts more difficult.
The conscious, balanced being is one who realizes we are social animals that through all challenges, interacting with others is a unique opportunity to learn about ourselves, and make personality modifications that are easily avoided with shallow encounters. More importantly, others offer a means of resonance in which to provide the chance to see who you are behind the clouds of obscuring the clarity. Life is a window to reach for both inner and outer qualities that make life more of a joy. A well balanced person is able to live, and positively interact with others, while at the same time be alone. Carry a smile, and a penchant for friendliness from the heart, and life begins to smile back.