Married with Issues
April 25, 2010
Married people with issues erroneously think it comes with the territory. Generally it does because rarely do people resolve their issues. Marriage is an opportunity for two people to communicate together to help each other move beyond unresolved childhood problems. Unfortunately, most go into putting ‘solvable issues’ on the back burner and turn it off while complaining and learning to work around each others problems which ultimately haunt the marriage.
Marriage is a ‘rental’ not a marathon to see who can last the longest, and call it a great marriage because of longevity. In the past, couples were forced to stay together because of ‘dependence’ on their life style which, for the woman especially with kids, left her without any source of income. Control and domination were common from the male until the slow rebellion and revolution of the female for freedom and independence in the 2nd half of the 20th century. Sadly, the ‘freedom revolution’ of the sexes went from one extreme of ‘dependence’ to independence totally by passing the ideal state of mutual interdependence.
Calling oneself fit for marriage is like someone calling themselves fit to be a surgeon without any preparation. People rarely fit in themselves with endless comfort, and when two merge who are both not enjoying the fit within their own skins, we have ‘chaotic marriage or partnership’! If people seriously injured and seeming to never walk again can, with great effort, later walk, people with emotional/mental injuries can certainly clear them. There are only excuses that serve the ego of denial and selfishness.
The ‘new marriage’ is one where couples seek or meet at a peak of consciousness that is maintained under all circumstances. The conscious couple is not about ‘trapping’ a partner for life but for changing moments that have no end or beginning with expectations. Communication, agreement, and a deep love serve to give to each other what is their destiny. Parting is always with love and sensitivity for the other. Always there will be a parting even if it’s death. Love overcomes internal problems and issues and leaves it’s ‘love print’ to guide each one through life in an inner euphoric bliss and joy. Marriage is a love state of mind and being.