March 10, 2010
Fire alarm, burglar alarm, or frustration with another is a sign of ‘where there’s smoke, there may be fire, or cause to call 911! No one in a ‘love coupling’ needs to have any habits that, if truth be known, invade the other’s space or comfort zone. Habits can either be like a home invasion or the smoke that starts a fire of discontent that spreads to both partners, and all others involved.
We all have a security system to protect us. Those living in deception and coverup lies subject the one at affect to be in harms way, or at the very least, unnecessarily vigilant for their peace of mind. Bad habits annoy others and particularly are destroyers of love that, for it’s care to grow, must be recognized as ‘fragile’, and needing the care of a gardener for a beautiful garden. Falling in love and then falling into a ‘dumbed down’ version of love or facsimile thereof is murder of what could be. Both with bad habits is a prescription for the kind of common marriages that have gone awry for ever. Either correct bad habits, stay out of relationships or, evacuate for the love and compassion of the other.
Positive egos open themselves to correction of bad habits. There should be no bad habit without the loving acceptance of a partner or anyone interacting with. People are notorious for holding on to behaviors that are uncomfortable to others with a selfish attitude of putting the blame on another for ‘dealing with them’. Bad habits unchecked are thorns to any success in love or, particularly in the case of ‘immature men’, for sustained sexual relationships. Love is changing bad habits into good ones until all bad ones evaporate.
Requiring anyone close to accept bad habits is just egotistical selfishness that is an alarm to not get too close. Many bad habits are leftovers from childhood that keep revolving into deeper and deeper behavior that harms all relationships. Slide good habits in as you slide bad habits out. Seek those with good transparent habits and keep those with bad ones at arms length, with compassion, never knowing when the alarm might go off to wake them up!
Arhata
