January 15, 2010
Pretending to be what one is not, can be a bad habit that one begins to believe! Song writer, Irving Berlin composed ‘Puttin’ on the Ritz’ in 1929. ‘Puttin’ on the Ritz’ meant, to ‘dress fashionably’ or, to be what one is not. Truth is veiled in a myriad of infinite ways misleading others as well as the ‘pretender’ who ironically, begins to identify with the ‘charade’. In a sense pretending to be what one is not can be a harmful scam to the unaware as well as one’s own ‘knowing their real self’.
Be it a ‘spiritual fraud , ‘snake oil salesman’, romantic suitor, social climber, god’s spokesman, cheatin’ partner or, any wannabe trying to ‘pull the wool’ over others eyes, a scam is to take advantage of the innocent’s eyes. And, then there’s the one on the opposite side who needs ‘Puttin on the Ritz’ to keep excited about the ‘facade’! Case in point, is one I’m reading of in a biography about the founder of CBS, one of the three major ‘beginning’ TV stations. William Paley, the founder, seemed to encourage ‘Yes people’ around him. One such was his wife, Babe, who would rise every morning (in her separate bedroom), to carefully put on her makeup and, best bedroom attire so that her husband, Bill, coming into her room, would keep him excited and interested in her. Bill on the other hand was a known ‘philanderer’ among the ladies while Babe suspected but, pretended to be in ignorance, not wanting to rock her ‘comfortable boat’.
Putting up a ‘false front’ is one of the very common ‘hidden secrets’ of couples, both among themselves and for the general public, to not see what goes on behind the scenes. Of course, when children are involved, sometimes for the welfare of the impressionable minds, it’s prudent to show them the face that covers up what’s, likely, immaterial but potentially damaging for them to see. Adults need be open to honesty, communication and, compassionate love without any facade particularly as when their relationship is an intimate one.
Freedom from all obstacles, particularly those clinging to fears of the mind, need be let go of for an authentic existence and positive life experience. A smile is a courtesy from the mind while an inner smile comes from the filled heart and, fills the heart of others.